Snap into a Dew like a Rockstar!

As if I needed another reason to hate the corporate world of action sports.

As if I needed a reason to despise all those X-Games veterans who skate like circus monkeys with no style.

As if the $50 tickets to go and get blasted by corporate advertising wasn't enough to drive me into a frothing rage.

Now I have a new piece of information that makes me want to set fire to the whole scene.

You know those energy drink chugging action sports stars you see on ESPN?  The ones standing up on top of the vert ramp, or mega ramp, or dirt ramp, or half pipe in the snow?  The ones that have their helmets completely covered with Monster or Rockstar energy drink stickers?

The ones that all the aspiring young kids look up to and want to emulate on their own skateboards/bikes/snowboards by hammering down a $1.50 energy drink after every run?

Know what these extreme adrenaline junkies are drinking up there to keep their bodies in prime condition for competition?

Water.

Yeah.  Turns out that they have these extra-large logo cans filled with water for the riders.

So that way it looks like they're knocking back all that anxiety attack fluid like it was the essence of life.

As if that is what gives them their edge.

And all the kids buy it, and then buy it.

And then they get heart issues and obesity.

Rock On.

Posted by jason | at Wednesday, August 04, 2010 | 1 comments